happy labor day!

I am happy to enjoy Labor Day off from work. How wonderful is it to take a much needed rest from labor.lol.

I'm still not recouped from my disappointments on the scales last evening, but I refuse to let it get me down. :D. I headed back to the gym again today to do my usual ab/cardio workout. I won't post the individual things because with all honesty, my heart wasn't in it.

Life is so heavy sometimes. There are private pains and sorrows that you can only share with your maker & with your closest friends. I have been wrestling with so many things since the start of summer, things that kicked me in the teeth things that still hurt me to my core............things that make me worry too much.

I have tried in Savannah. I have given my 100% in everything/everyone that I am. I feel like I am failing at so many things. I couldn't try any harder to be a good wife and Mother and sometimes I just wonder if my 100% is enough to keep anyone happy........

I was on the treadmill at the gym today & came to the decision that I am not staying here a minute longer than I have to. I am just as ignored & uncommunicated with as a human can be, and I'm tired of being depressed and sad over the fact I can't find my place here, and sick and tired of being at the same place I was heart wise in May. Everything I see/everwhere I go remind me of my failures here and no matter how much the sun shines on me and warms my face, inside my heart is heavy and nobody knows it but me.

I'm an adult, I know it's not about me all-the-time. Moving here was about TRav & being supprotive of him & his dreams as he has been mine. And only God knows how that's worked out for me. Lonely, sad and confused as to a lot of things.

I can only do so much, give so much, be so much. I am only me. If that's not enough for Savannah...or even for you.......that's fine. You can bite me. I'm finished.

I will continue to workout, no matter what. I love it too much & I love seeing the results on my body....and even if it's not for anyone but me.......it's FOR ME and that's exactly who it should be for, don't you agree?